Submitted by Grant, who’s a server in Los Angeles.
8 years of waiting tables and I can’t remember a shorter, more internally jarring experience with rudeness than what happened at the very end of my shift today. Long read ahead…
I get double sat with two tables. What that means, for those who don’t know, is that I got two tables for me to wait on at the same time. 
Now, most servers agree that treating the two tables as one big table is the most efficient way to take care of them both, i.e. getting drinks at the same time, greeting at the same time, etc.
I roll up to the lady at table 82, have my quick introduction, and she orders a diet coke for herself and a salad for her daughter. “You got it,” I said and turned around almost in the same spot I was standing to take care of table 85 which had been sat at the exact same time. The couple at 85 hadn’t been there before, so I begin running down the story with our restaurant. I am talking to them for about 15 seconds when I hear…
“Excuse me?”
I turn to the lady at 82 (who has interrupted my service).
“Yes?” I say.
“Could you go put our order in? We’re in a hurry.” says the lady at 82.
In this situation, which happens rarely, but does happen (you get interrupted), you really can’t turn back and ignore the lady who interrupted you, so you have no choice but to really go do what she wants.
“Sorry guys,” I say, “I’ll be right back.”
I run to the computer, put in her order, and come back with a diet coke. I drop off the diet coke to 82, and turn back to 85.
They are gone.
“Where…?” I begin.
This Stuff Could Very Well Keep you From Punching A Customer's Lights Out.
“They moved,” the lady at 82 says, “they called me a bitch and went to another table.”
Now, in my head I thought “holy shit, that’s awesome, because you were rude as fuck”. But I wasn’t able to even say “oh, really? I’m sorry”, cause the lady from 82 didn’t stop there.
“Yeah, and you know, when somebody gives you an order, you really should go put the order in right away. I’m not telling you how to do your job, but when people are in a hurry, you should get their food out as quick as you can.”
I respond, “Had I known you were in a hurry, I would have done that for you.”
“It’s LA,” she says, “Almost everybody is in a hurry.”
With that I go, get her food out, drop the check off at the same time, and a to-go box in case she wanted to take it home and never looked back. I managed to squeeze out “have a nice day”.
As for payment? Not only was “no tip” written in the tip spot, but the words “learn to wait on tables” was written on the payment slip.
That slip now hangs framed in my room, to remind me every time I see it that my parents may not have been perfect, but they sure as shit raised me better than that woman.
Oh, You've Got To Be Kidding.,
Anyone who has read Springs for any amount of time must know that is not her in the comment below. That is someone who did a beautiful rip-off of how nutz Springs can be at times, but there are quite a few points missing, that the real Springs ALWAYS makes. And, I hate to say it, her syntax and grammar are usually a bit better than that comment.
Nicely done – the whole time I was reading OP’s post all I could think was “OMG she was waiting on Springs.”
I tend to agree that you should probably have politely told the party at table 85 that you would be right back before going to put in table 82′s very simple order. You could have also asked table 85 if you could bring them back anything to drink. Just some constructive criticism.
Ive been a server for22 years and would have done things exactly the same as you did. No consttructive critisism here….The simple fact is that there are some people that you just plain CANT PLEASE!
Springs, i think you need to seek some psychiatric help for your multiple personality disorder, it is starting to worry me. and throw a side of schizophrenia on there too!
and what the hell is with all the caps locks words. You write like a high school girl. Please do me a favor, and take a entry level English course, it will do wonders.
I bet the customer was an ignorant —— ——.
Thanks for the comment. While I try not to edit any comments on here, I do feel there’s a better way to make a point than by using racial slurs (the really bad ones, at least).
do not feed the trolls
“That’s why if I were a server…” You aren’t a server…and working at a donut shop does NOT make you an authority on waiting tables. I’m not trying to be rude but your 10 page post (what I read of it) made little sense to me in regards to the original post. That woman knew from the second she walked into that restaurant that she was going to be a bitch. Maybe she had a bad day, gained some wait, had a waiter break her heart/steal her man in the past, name your cliche. Honestly you sound like a customer who would be a nightmare to serve based on that long winded ramble. It also seems like you have way too much time on your hands.